Thursday, 8 May 2014

May Countdown to Copenhagen: memories of Baku 2012

All hail, for 2012 heralded the arrival of hosting the contest in a country well-known for human rights violations  THE GREATEST EVER EUROVISION SONG.  Of course it would be Sweden to take the Greatest Ever crown.  And it's deserved, because Euphoria is just... well, it’s just everything. *contented sigh* 

At the other end of the scale, poor old Englebert – shall we generously pretend that it came last because old Humps had to sing first?  Ahem. Was it the best?  No - not even close.  But in all honestly, it wasn’t the worst one there either.  I mean, remember the Albanian dreadlock?  The Russian grannies?  The TRAVESTY that was the Azeri winners forgetting the words to Waterloo (at around 6.15 - PREPARE TO GASP IN HORROR).

There were lots of highlights too – the rest of that halftime entertainment piece for a start.  It was a really good year for trashy, fun, almost-listenable pop; my iPod has since happy shuffled its way through French vocal (and real) gymnastics; catchy Italian Winehouse-lite jazz; Norwegian dance cheese, and Danish lady indie-pop - all the more impressive when you note that she totally pulled off a Captain Birdeye hat).  And whilst we're on the subject of visual success, let us not forget the joy that was the Maltese foot dancing and the Turkish cape boat. 

A final, special, mention for Jedward’s swan song, Waterline.  I truly thought they’d be representing Ireland forever, as an oil portrait wrinkled itself to death in their mammy’s attic.  But it wasn’t meant to be; much like Samson and his scissors-woe, I suspect going quiff-less was their downfall – even if it was done in the name of on-stage shower-taking antics (fully dressed THANK THE GOD OF  MANCHILD TWINS).  At least we can remember two Jedward glory years - and, let’s face it, the inevitable reunion to come in a decade.

GOOD TIMES!


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